‘Be Sick… It’s Free’ or — Hypocritic Oaths?
At first glance Luigi Zampa’s ‘Be Sick… It’s Free’ (‘Il Medico Della Mutua’ — 1968) seems nothing more than a light, bright comedy about an Italian doctor and his patients. And that’s pretty much what it is yet this innocuous appearing comedy is also one of the most savage, biting and brutal satires I’ve seen in years, causing such a fuss on its release that the Italian Medical Association went berserk with outrage, even publicly condemning the film. And I can completely understand why because this movie absolutely destroys them, along with most of Italian society at the same time. Wow.
Alberto Sordi plays newly qualified doctor Guido Tersilli who, rather than treating private patients, decides to work for the medico della mutua, essentially treating Italians who get health care provided by the State. This is good in that payment is always guaranteed but bad in that he needs plenty of patients to make a living. Immediately his over-bearing mother, a “natural performer”, and Tersilli’s girlfriend set out to snag patients for him, usually by going to other doctor’s surgeries in the guise of being sick and proclaiming loudly in the crowded waiting rooms how terrible this doctor is and that he’s nowhere near as good as the wonderful new Dr Tersilli who’s opened up a new practice down the street.
And the plan works! Indeed, it works a little too well as its not long before Dr Tersilli is run off his feet and incurring the envy and jealousy of his rival doctors, seemingly creating as many enemies as patients. Not only that but his patients are just as corrupt at the medical establishment itself as not only do the doctors get paid for the number of patients they see — the more appointments the more money — but the patients are all too happy to come to their doctor as many times as they can for the free prescriptions and stuff they can claim from their chemist. It’s a mutually beneficial system for both parties even if it seems the entire Italian medical system is one big, huge racket that everyone is exploiting but that can’t be right, right? It’s not as thought healthcare would ever be used for financial gain or that Italians are prone to a little corruption and… and… er…
What’s great about ‘Be Sick… It’s Free’ is, apart from being seriously funny, is that every single aspect of Italian society is viciously skewered : the medical establishment is pure systemic corruption; the average Italian is a freeloading sheep; bambini are exploited; doctors are nothing more than “medical gangsters” who find other doctors “revolting vultures” and then there’s the great manipulator herself — the Italian mother.
Indeed, the film is so brutal and Dr Tersilli such an unlikable character (he feels like a medical version of Berlusconi by the end) going so far as visiting a dying doctor and seducing his wife to get his hands on his rival’s mutuati, and even selling himself sexually to his patients at one point when the doctor’s go on strike so he can’t accept payment for medical treatment, that we wouldn’t mind seeing him drop dead. Fortunately Alberto Sordi’s performance keeps us laughing and, after all, he’s only doing what everyone else is doing so he just about gets away with it.
Actually, ‘Be Sick… It’s Free’ attacks how the welfare system is taken advantage of so savagely that at times I was often worried it was an attack of socialism and welfare in general. It’s so acidic it can certainly seem that way, especially when the hospital doctors moan about welfare being the “root of their unrest” or that full socialisation is not the way to go as then everyone will be paid the exactly the same and that’s not why they spent all this time studying to become doctors. Equal pay for doctors? The very thought! Fortunately the feeling is very much one of the film lambasting corruption that was very much going on… by everyone. No one gets off the hook.
The script is sharp and very funny, the directing nicely handled and there is a great score sitting somewhere between lounge music and Rossini. It also helps if you speak Italian or are a very fast reader as everyone talks VERY quickly (I love it when Italian films do that) which adds nicely to the energy. There are some great gags such as when Dr Tersilli gets too many patients so consultation times get reduced to mere seconds or the nice touch when Dr Tersilli makes a home visit during the day and notices all the little bambini sitting watching the RAI test-card on the TV (this was daytime Italian TV in 1968 after all). Also, notice when Tersilli and the dying doctor’s wife fall onto the sofa to make love. It’s the woman he’s about to have sex with that we see him swoon out of shot with only to then hard cut to his inescapable mother tucking him into bed. And is every Italian an amateur physician? They always seem to know, or think they do, more than their own doctor.
‘Be Sick… It’s Free’ is great being both funny and damning, and will be as long as the medical world involves access to lots of money. It also still feels relevant — just replace state welfare with free market economics — revolving around how any system can be taken advantage of. Although you might not find it too funny if you’re a doctor. Fortunately I’m not so laughed my ass off… a condition which I can now seek medical treatment for.
