‘Dark Angel’ aka ‘I Come In Peace’ or — Better Than ‘Highlander’?

The one good thing about low expectations is they’re very easy to blow out the water.

And to say my expectations were low going into ‘Dark Angel’, aka ‘I Come in Peace’, were low would be a vast understatement. A low/middling budget Dolph Lundgren sci-fi film from 1990 that I’d never even heard of? “If I make it through fifteen minutes of this,” I thought to myself, “it’ll be a fucking miracle.”

What occurred last night wasn’t exactly a miracle (let’s not get carried away here, folks) but even though ‘Dark Angel’ isn’t a particularly good movie it isn’t particularly bad. In fact, in its own way it might be particularly great… if you stretch the definition of ‘great’ to its maximum tensile strength before it violently snaps.

‘Dark Angel’ straddles the 80s/90s and reeks of both to high heaven. It’s a buddy-movie like ‘Lethal Weapon’ (1987) before morphing into killer aliens on Earth fighting it out amongst us in a sort of ‘Predator 2’ (1990) meets ‘Highlander’ (1986) mash-up with overtones of an unstoppable sci-fi baddie with long hair as though ‘Warlock’ (1989) was impersonating ‘The Terminator’ (1984) before returning to ‘Highlander’ and ending up as ‘Robocop’ (1987). It has a script so generic and cobbled together from pre-existing material it should’ve been titled ‘Ersatz — The Motion Picture’.

Dolph Lundgren plays Detective Jack Caine, a maverick cop who plays by his own rules and nobody else’s and whose partner has just been killed during a botched drug bust by a gang of nasty bad guys. To help solve his partner’s murder and bring the drug gang to justice Caine’s hard-ass boss gives him a new partner — a straight-laced, by the book FBI agent called Larry Smith. These two are so chalk and cheese it’s almost comical… almost.

Meanwhile bodies are piling up, surprisingly including those of the gang members, many of which seem to have been killed by a highly magnetised compact disc, a piece of future technology so advanced the only logical conclusion is that the film’s script was written in the early 80’s when CD’s were a novelty. Other bodies’ bear puncture marks as though something had been injected or extracted into/out of them possibly as the result of some form of harvesting process, the only residue left being vast quantities of synthetic heroin. Maybe there’s more than one drug lord out there and this one isn’t from Earth? But just what is he extracting and why? And who is that other mysterious, alien, gun-wielding maniac constantly attempting to blow him away?

Can Caine and Smith solve the case before ‘The X-Files’ is commissioned and steals this film’s thunder? Will Robocop ask for his gun back? And then there’s the most shocking question of all — is this Dolph Lundgren’s best film?

So originality isn’t exactly ‘Dark Angel’s strong suit; it’s so cookie-cutter it makes a MacDonald’s cheeseburger seem like a bespoke gourmet meal. The boilerplate dialogue lacks the punch and fizz of better buddy movies so it has none of the wit of ‘Midnight Run’ (1988) or the sass of ’48 Hrs.’ (1982) even though you can feel it striving so hard for that level you feel the film might get cramp with the exertion. It gives off the sensation of having been written by someone who has seen these better films, understood them but can’t quite write up to that standard. Bless.

Yet what IS ‘Dark Angels’s strong suit (and this is vitally important) is the pacing, energy and action of which it has shit loads and it’s all great. Sure, ‘Dark Angel’s generic in the extreme but it means there’s no fat to choke on; yes, it’s cobbled together from disparate elements but it makes for a tonne of fun and, best of all, it was directed by a former stunt coordinator (and second-unit director on ‘Predator’) so the mayhem is supremely well executed. Gun muzzles blasts tear through the screen, explosions have a visceral kick and the timing of it all is spot on with every action beat perfectly placed for maximum effect. Not only that but, with the exception of a couple of ‘blink and you’ll miss them’ optical-effects near the start almost every stunt or effect is practical and in-camera. Much like ‘John Wick’ (2014) the fact this film was directed by an ex stunt-man shows, where a simple premise and story is there to hang the action from and it’s a blast.

Sure, the way the alien kills people risks becoming repetitive but each time a new death is shown a little bit more is revealed about the alien’s plan and just what he is up to. It’s surprisingly efficient visual story-telling as well as keeping you guessing as to what is going on. Maybe I’m just thick but when I discovered what the dastardly plan was I was more than a little impressed with the novelty. This is a Frankenstein’s monster of a concept built from pre-existing parts but, like the monster itself, it ends up being a pretty unique creation.

‘Dark Angel’ is not some lost masterpiece awaiting rediscovery but I kinda liked that about it as it allows more room for having silly fun with it without the pressure of legacy (and trust me, this film wants you to get on board and have fun with it). The script is technically robust if uninspired (it was co-written by David Koepp so that should tell you everything you need to know about the standard of writing), the acting is variable veering from wooden to acceptable but it’s the control director Craig R. Baxley has over everything else — tone, pacing and action — that elevates it up a notch and keeps it, well… just fun.

In its own sweet way ‘Dark Angel’ not only holds its own against its 80’s forbearers but in some cases, such as with the overrated and bloated ‘Highlander’ (and yes, I do mean the first one and not just of the sequels), might just be a little slicker and consistent at delivering the action goods. It might come in peace but it sure does kick ass.