3 days ago‘All That Heaven Allows’ or — The Vital Importance of Having Your Shrubbery Pruned?Cary Scott (Jane Wyman) is a wealthy, upper-class widow, mother of two children on the cusp of adulthood and who would now like her neglected garden to be given a good seeing to. Ron Kirby (Rock Hudson) is the young, local… tree guy?…All That Heaven Allows4 min readAll That Heaven Allows4 min read
5 days ago‘Inseminoid’ or — Better Than ‘Prometheus’?My expectations for Norman J. Warren’s ‘Inseminoid’ (1981) were so rock-bottom you could’ve surveyed them for oil deposits. A low-budget British ‘Alien’ (1979) rip-off starring Stephanie Beecham with a luridly provocative title and an even more off-putting poster? Er… okay? And those fears are pretty much born out for the…Inseminoid3 min readInseminoid3 min read
Mar 18‘Magnificent Obsession’ or — Crazed Sirk-adian Rhythms?‘Magnificent Obsession’ (1954) has been described as a “combination of kitsch and craziness and trashiness” with a “damned crazy story if ever there was one”. …Magnificent Obsession3 min readMagnificent Obsession3 min read
Mar 10‘Creed III’ or — Solid State Cinema?Spoiling ‘Creed III’ (2023) is both an impossibility and an inevitability because if I was to describe even the opening ten minutes then you would not only be able to predict the ending with mathematical precision but also simultaneously visualise every single plot point existing within because as soon as…Creed Iii3 min readCreed Iii3 min read
Mar 9‘The Working Class Goes to Heaven’ or — Even the Manzoni is Mechanised?Lulu (Gian Maria Volonté) is woken by machines every morning. He marches through the factory gates with lines other workers (and work shall set you free?) to operate machines that make pieces for other machines whose function Lulu is never told. …The Working Class Heaven4 min readThe Working Class Heaven4 min read
Feb 26‘Cocaine Bear’ or — Okay-aine Bear?I’d deliberately kept my expectations low for ‘Cocaine Bear’ (2023) because the concept and trailer were both so cool I didn’t want to risk over-hyping it in my head. And I did a pretty good job until, on the day I went to see it, someone told me they hoped…Cocaine Bear2 min readCocaine Bear2 min read
Feb 20‘Amsterdamned’ or — Imagine ‘Jaws’… Except Without the Shark… and Set in the Middle of a City?I’d never heard of Dick Maas’ ‘Amsterdamned’ (1988) until the weekend but considering my experience of Dutch cinema is completely non-existent I didn’t feel too bad about my ignorance of it. But what sort of film would it be? …Amsterdamned3 min readAmsterdamned3 min read
Feb 19‘Sonny and Jed’ or — Cinema for Nasty Schoolboys?(Warning — contains language and imagery that might upset some readers, especially Quentin Tarantino fans) So my mate came round for movie night on Friday evening. “Hey, Colin! We should watch ‘Sonny and Jed’. It was the subject of one of…” “Quentin Tarantino’s latest podcast?” (He’s recently joined the cult…Sonny And Jed4 min readSonny And Jed4 min read
Feb 13‘Il Tetto’ or — Gimme Shelter?It opens with the humble wedding of Natale and Luisa, a young couple deeply in love. We suspect Natale doesn’t have much money because he pays the chauffeur with wedding candies. …Il Tetto3 min readIl Tetto3 min read
Feb 8‘The Boston Strangler’ or — “Realism” My Perfectly Formed Ass?!Richard Fleischer’s ‘The Boston Strangler’ (1968) opens by declaring that the events we are about to witness actually happened and does so with the attitude and stance of a purveyor of truth and realism: the camera has the roving eye of a probing investigator; the soundtrack is a collage of…The Boston Strangler4 min readThe Boston Strangler4 min read